Hangover Ratings

[KiwiStaz]

Hangover Ratings

1 star hangover
No pain. no real feeling of illness. You slept in your own bed and when you woke up there were no traffic cones in there with you.
You are still able to function relatively well on the energy stored up from all those vodka and Red Bulls.
However, you can drink 10 bottles of water and still feel as parched as the Sahara.
Even vegetarians are craving a Cheeseburger and a bag of fries.

2 star hangover
No pain, but something is definitely amiss. You may look okay but you have the attention span and mental capacity of a stapler.
The coffee you hug to try and remain focused is only exacerbating your rumbling gut, which is craving a full English breakfast.
Although you have a nice demeanour about the office, you are costing your employer valuable money because all you really can handle is some light filing, followed by aimlessly surfing the net and writing junk e-mails.

3 star hangover
Slight headache. Stomach feels crap. You are definitely a space cadet and not so productive.
Anytime a girl or lad walks by you gag because the perfume/aftershave reminds you of the random gin shots you did with your alcoholic friends after the bouncer kicked you out at 1:45 am.
Life would be better right now if you were in your bed with a kebab and a litre of coke watching daytime TV.
You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 6 chicken nuggets and a litre of diet coke yet you haven't peed once.

4 star hangover
You have lost the will to live. Your head is throbbing and you can't speak too quickly or else you might spew.
Your boss has already lambasted you for being late and has given you a lecture for reeking of booze.
You wore nice clothes, but you smell of socks, and you can't hide the fact that you (depending on your gender) either missed an oh-so crucial spot shaving, or, it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the dodgems.
Your teeth have their own individual sweaters. Your eyes look like one big vein and your hairstyle makes you look like a reject from a second-grade class circa 1976.
You would give a weeks pay for one of the following - home time, a cheeseburger and somewhere to be alone, or a Time Machine so you could go back and NOT have gone out the night before.
You scare small children in the street just by walking past them.

5 star hangover
You have a second heartbeat in your head, which is actually annoying the employee who sits next to you.
Vodka vapour is seeping out of every pore and making you dizzy.
You still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth from brushing your teeth.
Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva, so your tongue is suffocating you.
You'd cry but that would take the last drop of moisture left in your body.
Death seems pretty good right now. Your boss doesn't even get mad at you and your co-workers think that your dog just died because you look so pathetic. You should have called in sick because, let's face it, all you can manage to do is breathe ..... very gently.

6 star hangover
You arrive home and climb into bed.
Sleep comes instantly, as you were fighting it all the way home in the taxi.
You get about 2 hours sleep until the noises inside your head wake you up.
You notice that your bed has been cleared for take off and is flying relentlessly around the room.
No matter what you do you now, you're going to chuck.
You stumble out of bed and now find that your room is in a yacht under full sail.
After walking along the skirting boards on alternating walls knocking off all the pictures, you find the toilet.
If you are lucky you will remember to lift the lid before you spontaneously explode and wake the whole house up with your impersonation of walrus mating calls.
You sit there on the floor in your undies, cuddling the only friend in the world you have left (the toilet), randomly continuing to make the walrus noises, spitting, and farting. Help usually comes at this stage, even if it is short lived.
Tears stream down your face and your abdomen hurts. Help now turns into abuse and he/she usually goes back to bed leaving you there in the dark.
With your stomach totally empty, your spontaneous eruptions have died back to 15-minute intervals, but your body won't relent.
You are convinced that you are starting to turn yourself inside out and swear that you saw your tonsils shoot out of your mouth on the last occasion.
It is now dawn and you pass your disgusted partner getting up for the day as you try to climb into bed. She/he abuses you again for trying to get into bed with lumpy bits of dried vomit in your hair.
You reluctantly accept their advice and have a shower in exchange for them driving you to the hospital.
Work is simply not an option.
The whole day is spent trying to avoid anything that might make you sick again, like moving.
You vow never to touch a drop again and who knows for the next two or three hours at least you might even succeed.

OK, now hands up all those who have never had a six star hangover!!

Thought so!!

[Mick]

an honest 61\2 stars for me.

4 years ago. in college. still cannot drink more than 3 ice cold beers at a time.

put 12 stubbies through the beer bong 3 at a time... in 10 minutes

my house when the pares were away.

came to 12 hours later and threw up blood and bile for two days, no other fluid came out.

more painful than pinching nerves between back vertabrae.

[skip]

There are numerous hangover types between three and four. Experience tells me this. You know, the ones where you wake up fine about 11am.....and then by 4pm you've chucked. Or when you wake up fine and the first coffee causes you to chuck immediately. And so on

I had a 2.5 star one on Friday morning. Fine, just, but 4 hours sleep after a dozen brews was not enough. Worked all day, very sketchily. A couple of beers after work sent me to sleep for 12 hours. Felt fine on Saturday :D

[toysrus]

Word of warning, stay away from black sambucca, only have 4-5 shots max otherwise they will hit you very hard after 5 hours and when you've got girls to keep happy, you'll regret ever drinking so many 'cause your head hurts too much

[dims]

i second that....a while ago i mate n me sculled a bottle of vodka in 5 mins cos we didnt want to buy drinks in the club...went in, had 2 shots of sambucca black....3 hours later i was hurling and if anything, gettin more drunk...next day drove to my casual job at the time which is only 5 mins away from my house, left at 9:30 when i started at 10 cos i was that p1ssed in the morning when i woke up, got to work at 9:35 and passed out in the car out the front of my job :beer

[Glen GSR III]

After formal party 2005... 6 star rating

jesus chirst, felt great all nite/morning. We had an open bar happening. I got absolutely para, wont even attempt to put a no. on how much was drank.

Smoked all nite (im a non smoker) and got home to a mates place when we were kicked out at 5:30 am. Still felt great...


until i ate some food Fuck, for the next 3 hours i had stuff coming out of me that i didn't even know existed Couldn't breathe either, lungs felt like some one had shat on them.

I definetley learnt my lesson... sort of

Then came schoolies

[Mick]

glen gsr 111... nice :beer

feel my pain

[Mick]

of yeah did you smash heaps of fanny at schoolies?

[Glen GSR III]

Not really mate,

g/f of the time was with me, that sort of limited the options LOL

[Mick]

ah well you cant help bad luck LOL

good opportunity to put a few lay-by's on :beer

[Matt]

yeah pretty much everyweekend im usally on a 6 star rating by sunday... best way to fix it is to keep on drinkin... sundays always a bitch

[TD05]

worst hangover is the one when you fall asleep on your arm and it goes to sleep then breaks when leant on as you wake up, or having to get it amputated because of lack of blood flow.... :(

[toysrus]

worst hangover is the one when you fall asleep on your arm and it goes to sleep then breaks when leant on as you wake up, or having to get it amputated because of lack of blood flow.... :(

Wtf ?? :o

Are you serious....?

[TD05]

worst hangover is the one when you fall asleep on your arm and it goes to sleep then breaks when leant on as you wake up, or having to get it amputated because of lack of blood flow.... :(

Wtf ?? :o

Are you serious....?

dead.. :o

[toysrus]

I take it you know someone personally that this has happened to ?