Beer vs. .........

If you think it might offend someone, chuck it in here where the wusses don't look!
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Alspos
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Beer vs. .........

Post by Alspos »

My apologies in advance to any women that are offended by this one. :wink:



Beer vs. Vagina

1.Beer is always wet.
Vagina needs a little work.
One point to BEER

2.Warm beer tastes awful.
One point to VAGINA

3.A really cold beer is satisfying.
One point to BEER

4.If after taking a swig of your favourite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit.
One point to VAGINA

5.If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc.
If you get home reeking of vagina your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you.
There's definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances.
I'll just call it a DRAW for the time being.

6.Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home.
Ten vaginas in one night and you don't want to drive anywhere.
One point to VAGINA

7.If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer.
If you eat any pussy in public, you become a legend.
One point to VAGINA

8.If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested.
If you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer.
One point to VAGINA

9.You normally don't find old beer.
One point to BEER

10.Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers.
Too much vagina and you'll think you've seen god.
One point to VAGINA

11.Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring.
Ripping off panties is fun.
One point to VAGINA

12.In most countries there's a tax on beer.
One point to VAGINA

13.If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off.
One point to BEER

14.You can always be sure if you're the first one to open a bottle or a can.
One point to BEER

15.If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but it eventually it settles down.
One point to BEER

16.With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner, ale, lager, etc.
One point to BEER

17.You always know how much beer is going to cost.
One point to BEER

18.Beer doesn't have a mother.
One point to BEER

19.Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you've drunk it.
One point to BEER

FINAL SCORE: BEER: 10 VAGINA: 8
That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER
PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry,degraded or discriminated, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them, an extra point for BEER!
robert26t
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Post by robert26t »

lol, some ppl have to much time :P... trusty beer :beer
Glenjo
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Re: Beer vs. .........

Post by Glenjo »

Alspos wrote:19.Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you've drunk it. One point to BEER
no.. but it can be nice to show your gratitude.. :wtf:
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Chryzla
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Post by Chryzla »

depends how many beers you have, the next morning you might be hugging your procelain god :P
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ajs_starion
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Post by ajs_starion »

that is great....
i guess they both have their moments but
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MelbStazz
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Post by MelbStazz »

:D rofl Awesome.
Amen to that.
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NachoMan
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Post by NachoMan »

Beer is more readily available...
ProZac
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Post by ProZac »

Not when i was 17, its about even now ;)

"12.In most countries there's a tax on beer.
One point to VAGINA"
Oh, theres a tax on vagina, believe me.
Glenjo
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Post by Glenjo »

ProZac wrote: Oh, theres a tax on vagina, believe me.
what the shit!? where do you shop?
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Chryzla
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Post by Chryzla »

ebay rofl
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Post by NachoMan »

I think that should read "Vagina can be taxing"
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Darkelf
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Post by Darkelf »

Zac shops at Wendys!!!! :D
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TD05
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Post by TD05 »

ha ha ha , rofl


plus you don't get diseased if you drink CHEAP BEER!!! :D
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